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#1 danceInTheRain



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Posted 22 November 2011 - 06:14 PM

hello everybody,
i have a very good friend who is trying to let go of the movie thing. the problem is, that she really loves good acting and watching movies is an outlet for her. not an addiction. she is the type that will make a movie date and watch one a week. she often tells me how gross she feels and how she wishes she could stop only there is nothing better out there.
can anyone suggest CLEAN stuff. or is there anything jewish out there?
but please, not the type that you have to skip parts and all that. REALLY TRULLY clean
thanks a million,

life is not about waiting for the storm to pass. its about learning to dance in the rain

#2 SilverShoes



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Posted 30 November 2011 - 08:30 PM

There is the kosher films.
Made and completely for women.

#3 taon



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Posted 04 December 2011 - 04:56 PM

I dont know about kosher, but she can try for more kosher. tznius sress isnt as major an issue for her as it would be for men, though she should still try to avoid it. but ones where thye dont dress so provocatively, or theere is no chance anyone would want to emulate the way of dress shown, may be better. Maybe if it's a cartoon or takes place outdoors in the cold?. Or just doesnt focus on pritzus. Maybe if it's about kids, or the elderly. avoiding things that present an attitude or nonkosher ideal. And of course keep clean language, no large amounts of violence. One step at a time.

#4 ilavHashem



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Posted 25 December 2011 - 11:50 PM

tell her to make a KABBALA, take a big step
cold turkey is hard, but limits, breaking it (verryy common), depression, back to square one.....(or cv worse) is harder!

take her at a moment of inspiration! and if she's the type to persevere...thn a a kabbala at such a time is awesummm!!!

my inspiration:
1)ask yourself:
WHAT HAVE I DONE FOR HIM...as silly as it sounds...i want to do something for Hashem! (and myself!)

a mashal:
you and Hashem are sitting on the couch together, the tv is off, the remote between you
you want to whatch your fave movie that on now
He wants the tv off
will you let Him rest, do as you please...
He who gives you everything you have! everything! (HEs' you father, best friend, king and creator!)
won't you give him this moment of silence!
it may be hard for you
after all you need to unwind, laugh with friends over the actor's lines, enjoy a little no-think time...
think of how much greater the schar if you give even all it means to you- away to Him!

2) (didn't really inspire me...but i heard ot once:)
make yourself holy so Hashem can dwell there...
"vi asu li mikdash vishachanti bisocho"
the presence of the Schina cannot rest in a place of Tumah....

3) we say the movies don't affect us, (the books, music, TV)
but they do...we don;t control it!
in a miforesh in vayeshev (i fotgot which one) on the words "vayanas vayetzei hachutza"
when yosef ran from aishes potifar
we learn from yosef to run from sacana...waht is that? the danger of doing a chet
we learn to run from a place of nisayon! never stay and fight the yetzer hara
because it is a bloody battle
the yetzer hara knows all our weaknesses!
evn if we say we wont let the shmutz affect us, it does anyways!
we think out yetzer hara wont get us now, but he never leaves, he crouches in the doorway, waiting for an opening,a weak spot, a chance to make us sin!
our yetzer tov is equally powerful! fighting for the good...help him win!

i'll write more at another time....hopefully....imyH...so tired....srry about bad spelling
i wish you alot of hatzlacha

#5 dojoyo



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Posted 19 February 2012 - 09:22 PM

so i was struggling with the same thing as ur friend last year
k so basically ik ur gonna tell me that movies is an outlet 4 her but it's REALLY not a good outlet to have!!! i can't promise 4 sure b/c im not her but i don't think it's gonna do her such a good job as being an outlet. for me personally, TV totally changed my life and made me be a monster version of myself- i wasn't acting like myself and i became a big hypocrite. it also really makes you start to believe tht ur part of their world which ur not! so i dnt think thts the gr8est idea of an outlet.
so after i stopped i was really bored- i still am to tell u the truth b/c i used to spend hours upon hours glued to my computer screen. so then i sterted watching really harmless stuff- u know like lion king and little kid movies b/c i was so bored and my excuse was tht it's not bad- it wasn't except that it made me stop being myself again and made me glued to the computer again. so i think what im gonna do and i suggest this 4 ur friend as well is to get urself involved in things- like make sure u have LOTS to do- chesed, babysitting, music lessons, study night with friends, you name it! or maybe even tell urself ur gonna help @ home once a week and give urself a day 4 that- what im saying is dont leave too much time 4 urself to be BORED- make use of ur time! of course have some time 4 urself but not too much tht u have nothing to do
B' Hatzlacha! i hope it all works out! im also gonna try it out!

#6 Punims



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Posted 20 February 2012 - 12:43 AM

I'm also looking for more ideas on things to do late at night, when watching shows seems like a really interesting thing to do!

#7 flybird



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Posted 20 February 2012 - 12:36 PM

one thing that worked for me is to take it minute by minute. For that one minute think I'm not gonna watch movies, in another minute I can. And then after a while of pushing it off, sometimes I still end up watching it, but then I feel so bad that I waited this long that I usually just stop it in the middle, but usually after a while, u end up thinking whats the point anymore.

some things I'd do late at night of watching something is to call a friend, and tell them you want to watch this right now, can you give me a pep talk- besides for making you not want to watch it anymore, it keeps you busy! Also, Idk if this would help so much, but think of something you didnt do in a while, a small activity like putting pictues into albums, or even writing a journal. You can make it a challenge for yourself- what I try to do is set up goals- I try writing in my journal a list of good things about different people every night, so I set up goals, to do let say 6 people in a week. So it takes time to do, and if I want to watch something instead, I tell myself that I have to do that first. Another good thing is to set up a bedtime- it really works! If I tell myself I have to go to sleep at 10, and I see something I want to watch at 9 30, and its 2 hours, I'm not gonna watch it.
Good luck!!