5 replies to this topic

[shifpifer1]

1) is it considered wrong halachicly, or will ruin a marriage if someone knows their husband or wife from before they get married? cuz there is a lot of strict stuff about not talking or spending time with the person b/c its not tznius and could ruin the shidduch. also what about if they know the family, but not the boys?

2) are there just plain shadchanim that work with people? like, say im frum and i just want a frum guy and i have criteria, and she doesnt only set up modern or yeshivishe people. like find a guy whos what im looking for with good middos?

[Rabbi Shapiro]

It's Halachicly prohibited to be friends with boys for social reasons.

However, it does not say you can't marry such a friend. It also doesn't say it will ruin the Shiduch.

[shifpifer1]

rabbi shapiro!!
What if you know (not know closely) the boy your going out with?

[Rabbi Shapiro]

That sometimes happens. It's not a problem. For example, sometimes a Rebbi will end up having his daughter go out with one of his students who frequent his Shabbos table. As long as things are arranged properly it's fine.

[Menorah]

Is it proper for someonein the parsha to ask a shadchan to redt a specific person he or she is interested in?

[Rabbi Shapiro]

Yes.