Jump to content


Photo

My Shoulder Sag


  • Please log in to reply
5 replies to this topic

#1 haunted soul

haunted soul

    Member

  • Members
  • 4 posts

Posted 08 June 2012 - 12:18 PM

My shoulders sag,
My feet I drag,
All forlorn.
Right or left?
Completely bereft
My soul is torn.

I want to try,
I try to want,
I am drained.
My strength is gone,
My hope is done,
I am stained.

I know it’s wrong,
To return I long,
I see no way.
The door is barred,
Forever scarred,
I am there to stay.

The monster loomed,
Forever doomed,
I have caved in.
I’ve failed the test,
I have no rest,
No peace from within.

#2 DUNO

DUNO

    Member

  • Members
  • 12 posts

Posted 13 June 2012 - 07:24 PM

wow such an awesome poem. but you're always g-ds child and no matter wut he'll always love you. talk to him he's really there n he can help. g-d created us human we make mistakes and we sin g-d never intended us to b angels. Gud luck! hope things get better.

#3 jew

jew

    Member

  • Members
  • 11 posts

Posted 14 June 2012 - 02:19 PM

somethings not right. this poem sounds depressing. like theres no hope. as I learned from my rabbi, nobody does anything just because. so whats up? why would you put an amazing poem online that reflects inner feelings on an online forum if you werent looking for help or at least a comment?

#4 haunted soul

haunted soul

    Member

  • Members
  • 4 posts

Posted 15 June 2012 - 09:58 AM

I actually have a sequel to this poem... i just have to find it..

#5 haunted soul

haunted soul

    Member

  • Members
  • 4 posts

Posted 18 June 2012 - 10:44 AM

And still I know,
That even though,
I am so weak.
Full of despair,
I can barely bare,
Yet I must seek.

Ill stumble and fall,
Yet try to stand tall,
For I must come out alive.
But can I shut out the voice,
Yelling there’s no choice,
You won’t come out alive..?

My bed is waiting,
Black and white debating,
The worst and best in fight.
I shut my heart and mind,
No solution I can find,
The easiest is night.

But as I pull my cover,
I hear a haunting whisper,
Is there no chance to save?
Am I ready to close the lid,
Fill it up with mud,
And bury myself in a grave???

#6 reachingforthestars

reachingforthestars

    Member

  • Members
  • 7 posts

Posted 29 July 2012 - 10:17 PM

wow your poem is so well written. It sux that you feel like you have reached the end of the tunnel and there is no way to exit. What happened that made you feel this way? is everything okay now?