Just wanted to let you know your poem really hit home. I relate to what you are going thru, and am actually going thu something similar where 2 of my closest friends are in the 2 situations you described (well one is already engaged, not getting engaged but same idea). Its funny, cuz I think, ok my friends are busy with different things right now, and obviously i care for them and try to be with them in their time of joy/ challenge- but why i am letting the fact that they are busy get to me so much, I am a big girl, I'm not in high school anymore, why am I so dependent on my friends. But it still is a really big deal for me, and I needed to accept that.
And I have also gone to a therapist and I know what you mean about it not being the same confiding in a friend vs a therapist.
I really like how you ended your poem with talking about davening. So many times I have also felt that davening, sometimes to the point of begging from a place of desperation (reminds me of levels of Tefillah- if you ever learned Shearim BeTefillah by Rav Pincus when he talks of Bitzur vs Shavah vs Tzakah etc) , has been what helps me get through the times i feel so so alone.
Anyways, another thing that helped me but i dont know if its shayach to you is that I was probably too over invested in these friendships, and cared too much about maintaining the friendships to the point of being slightly overbearing and neglecting others in my life. For me this experience is helping me to learn a little to let go of my friends and give them some space, and to invest in other relationships, like my family that I had been neglecting for a while and other friends that I haven't been keeping up with. (in addition of course to still trying to be there for my other friends)
Much Hatzlacha with this challenge and all others (and with finding your zivug soon BEH!)